Purple Spots

I have a friend who has been known to break out in purple blotches in times of stress. God knows Jim is having severe stress, but that's not what is causing this latest manifestation. These spots are the result of his chemo. They are like dime-sized bruises, although more livid than a run-of-the-mill bump. He has one on his hand, one on his cheek, one on his neck. He was assured they would fade once his blood counts (red and white) get back up to normal. Those numbers, along with his hemoglobin and hematocrit are all quite a bit below normal. Other numbers, however, are doing fine and, I guess, are not as severely affected. His creatinine (kidney function) is holding on. A miracle, given the poisons they have to filter out. This number has not changed at all, from before the onset of treatment until now. What can I say? The guy's got killer kidneys.

After I wrote about the joys of listening to Mozart it appears that Jim is now losing his hearing. Not exactly losing it, but how he hears things has changed. Music is sharp and tinny. All sounds have a different timbre to them. So now, not only can he not speak -- his voice is completely gone -- but he can't hear. In an election year, for this man this is not good news. Both of these conditions will eventually resolve. Just wait. There's another election in 2008!

It appears that tonight was the last "table for two" dinner we will have for awhile. Jim can no longer eat or swallow food. He can still get water and meds down, but nothing else. From now on it will be liquid calories through the feeding tube to the tune of about 2000 calories per day to maintain his weight. Even with Vicodin it is too painful. What he had requested for dinner was some salmon, some macaroni and cheese and some broccoli. Anybody want some leftover macaroni? I can always make salmon cakes, and I love cold broccoli, but mac and cheese and I just don't get close. So for awhile it will be "table for one." I will miss my dining partner and the snappy repartée at the table. I predict it will all be business as usual by Christmas!

We have had a lovely walk around the neighborhood. The weather is cool and crisp; the kind that puts roses in your cheeks. Now two days of relief from the assault of radiation, two days to recover and rest. For both of us.

The Cardinals have won the World Series. And the crowd went wild. Put that one to bed for another year.